Nighttime is the hardest. I am not sleeping well. I don’t have any distractions. Every night I toss and turn. And think of Rich. And miss him. And cry.
Everything I do reminds me of his absence. Visiting my children. Going places where we went together. Cooking dinner.
Had a BBQ today with my children and grandchildren. It felt good to be with them and yet, there was a big empty space inside me. Someone was missing.
My husband. The father. The grandfather. Oh, how he would have loved being there.
He probably was in some mysterious spiritual way. Present in my children and grandchildren. Present in me. Present in our memories. Present in our love for each other and our love for him.
That’s what I have to remember. I have to look for him in the places and people he loved. And look for him in things we did together. And try not to let the sad memories push away the happy ones. And then maybe he won’t seem so far away.
Catholic Prayer Life 
Colleen,
The memories are helpful stepping stones for peace. At least for me. However, 8 1/2 years later there is still the void, but much better in dealing with the loss. Time does help to heal wounds.
Peace & Blessings,
Pat
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Thank you Pat. I can see what you mean by stepping stones. And I’m grateful for those memories even with the tears.
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❤️🙏
Sent from my iPhone
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Dear Colleen Today being Memorial Day we are asked to remember those who went home to The Lord. As you remember Rich and all the happy moments you had together, I hope it will bring you some peace.
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Thank you Barbara. Some days the memories do bring peace. Some days tears. But I’m grateful for those memories everyday.
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God Bless youu.
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